I checked a really close friend’s social media post and she displayed a beautiful picture. She was well put together and her sunglasses drew my attention. It is beautiful and I considered it oddly shaped too. It looked like a diver’s goggle to me. I decided to comment on the picture. I was going to say…
“Your sunglasses looks that of a fisherman” with a laughing emoji.
She is my really close friend and I assume she will “know” that I am joking and will not take my banter serious.
As I posed my fingers over the keyboard to type, something in me made me hesitant and I decided to comment different. I instead told her that she looked stylish and beautiful. I left out my “fisherman sunglasses comment”
WORD = Life Or Death
Every word we speak carries a meaning and a relative interpretation from the receiver of the word or compliment. I could tell her “your sunglasses looks like that of a fisherman” and she would laugh it off with me or even tell me that odd shape is why she likes it.
On the flip side, she could interpret my comment to mean “the sunglass is ugly and she might never wear it with confidence again”. Whereas the sunglasses sat nicely on her face and is a beauty.
Also…
I thought she looked nicely put together. I noticed the beautiful black shirt, and the faded blue jean paired nicely with a beautiful green stilettoes. Her hair was a work of art too. But I ignored all that and I choose to comment on that beautiful albeit oddly shaped sunglasses by jokingly calling it something she might interpret as demeaning.
Lesson No 1…Give wholesome compliments. Don’t focus on what you don’t understand or consider odd .
- “You look beautiful”.
- I love your outfit.
- “Your sunglasses is unusual and it is sitting so pretty on you”
- Or you say nothing at all!
LESSON NO.2
Some words we consider empty banter can be a bullet to a vulnerable person. And we often might not know when a person is vulnerable. People often hid vulnerability. We don’t put banners on our head that says
“Hey watch what you say- I am emotionally vulnerable today”
Even if they did, you for the most part would not see it except you are having a face to face conversation and I believe another insensitive soul will make a joke about the banner.
15th COMMANDMENT- THOU SHALL BE MINDFUL OF WHAT YOU SAY.
I believe Humour is one of the most important spice of life. A light hearted banter every now and then is good for the heart even ( the doctor’s recommends it … haha).
My point is we should all realise how important words are. Even words said in jokes or in a light atmosphere also carry a meaning. Choose words that would give life to a person and not kill their esteem or desire.
Sometimes, some words don’t even need to be said so swallow it!
I want to add that not all words are meant to make us feel good. Words of correction or rebuke do not make us feel excited- we instead feel sombre. And yet those words of rebuke and correction are necessary for our growth.
In conclusion, let’s be mindful of what we say and how we say it is equally important.
Sow your “word seed” wisely.
I appreciate you coming around. Till next time and…
KEEP BLOOMING ❤️❤️❤️
You are absolutely right, Lade. Written words are easily misunderstood. It is best to discuss important matters face to face or at least over the telephone. Blessings!
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True, important matters should be clearly expressed in person or in clear words over the phone. Thank you sir 🙏
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That 15th Commandment is right on target 🎯
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Yes! thank you❤️
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Wow, Lade, this one hit me hard for I just made a mistake not too long ago with my daughter in law. My intend was to encourage but I was so caught up in speaking, I did not pray and let my zeal to help her get away from me. So I hurt her, deeply since she is a deeply insecure person, which I know, yet again my zeal. You will notice I used the pronoun, “my” and “I” which made my comment to her all about me. I cannot apologize to her since it was my son who told me I hurt her. I know God forgives me and I forgive me to but I get this post. Life’s mistakes are never easy to take but without them we would never know the grace of God and see Him work despite our mistakes. A few weeks later I talked to my son and he told me I did not ruin my relationship with her, that made my heart glad. I need discernment more than I need zeal. Blessings.
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Wow! So We must be careful to balance zeal and discernment.
But like you stated, “life mistakes are never easy to take- but without them we would never know the grace of God” that’s profound. “his strength is made perfect in our weakness” wow! What a good God.
Through it all, I am glad your relationship with your daughter in law is preserved . And I believe she will come to understand what you are trying to communicate in time.
Blessings Ma❤️
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Well done little sister. ❤❤❤❤
“She opens her mouth with wisdom,
and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue” –Proverbs 31:26
P.S. You look very beautiful and professional in your profile photo. You are going to be an amazing lawyer.
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Awwwn your comment warms my heart. Thank you big sis❤️❤️❤️
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Great Piece
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